BPD or Borderline Personality Disorder is a very serious mental health condition that can cause the sufferer to be quite impulsive and unstable at times. They often have difficulty dealing with interpersonal relationships of all kinds. Also, those suffering from BPD can also have very serious effects on their relatives and/or partners.
Women Tend to Suffer From BPD More
There is about 2% of the population suffers from some sort of personality disorder, and women tend to suffer from BPD more so than men. Also, it’s more common with people who have relatives that also suffer from something similar such as depressive disorders, anti-social disorders, or drug and alcohol abuse. Many of them often are found to have been abused as children or suffered from some sort of maltreatment while growing up. They also may have lost their parents or they suffered from neglect at the hands of their parents.
How Can You Help Those Suffering From BPD?
Dealing with a loved one that’s suffering from BPD can be quite difficult. There are ways that you can help them as well as yourself. Here are a few tips on just how you can support your loved one suffering from BPD as well as help to improve the relationship that you have with them.
One of the best ways to help someone suffering from BPD is to learn as much about the disorder that you possibly can. It’s important that you do some good research from sources that are reputable. This way you will have a better understanding of what BPD is and how it can affect the people who happen to be suffering from it. The only way to be of any kind of help is if you understand the true nature of this mental issue.
Encourage them to Get a Proper Diagnosis
It’s important that you do your best to encourage them to seek help and get a proper diagnosis if you suspect that BPD could be what they are suffering from. Since you are not trained to make one it is important that they seek the right kind of help in order to get the proper treatment. If they are unwilling to do so, offer to go with them and help them however you can.
Get Your Own Support
Even though it’s extremely important that you help them find the support they need for their BPD issues, it’s also important that you have your own support. You should be able to have someone to talk to about what you’re experiencing and feeling. By having a professional to rely on when you are stressed over your loved one is going to make you feel a lot less isolated.
Be There With Emotional Support
As difficult as it might be at times, it’s important that you let them know that you are there for them to offer them emotional support. It’s important that you try to be as patient and understanding as you can under the circumstances. It’s important to be as empathetic as possible with them because even though they need to learn to behave better, they need to realize that with your support they can improve how they act. However, sometimes it can be quite difficult for a person to change their behavior without professional help, being supportive is part of that treatment. One thing you need to remember that even though you are suffering from their behavior, the person that suffers the most is the one suffering from BPD.
It’s Important to Include Them in Some of Your Plans
An important thing to remember is that you don’t want to make those suffering from BPD to feel more isolated than they already do, so it’s important that you try to include them in some of your plans. This will show them that you think they are valuable and that you are thinking about them and enjoy their company. It’s also important to also try to be as sensitive and empathetic as possible about any doubts or fears they may have of being abandoned and most importantly try to avoid hurting their feelings.
Never Tolerate Lying
Even though it’s important that you try to be as understanding and empathetic as possible that does not mean that you have to tolerate lies, abusive treatment or emotional blackmail by your loved one that might be suffering from BPD. This type of behavior is nothing going to help either one of you.
Don’t Take It Personally
When there is an episode or a crisis, it’s important that you do your best to try and not take it personally. As much as it might hurt you need to remember they aren’t acting this way because they have purposely decided to do so, but most of the time it’s because they simply can’t help their own behavior.
Avoid Being Overprotective
If you’re dealing with someone suffering from BPD try not to be overprotective of them. It’s important that they must be allowed to have opportunities to make their own mistakes and then, in turn, learn from those same mistakes.
Divert Them From Obsessing on the Past
If the person you know becomes over obsessed with things that have happened in the past, it’s a good idea to try and divert that obsession away from the past and get their attention to focus on the present. Do your best to encourage them to live in the present and not in the past. This will help them keep from suffering from excessive anxiety.
Remember BPD is a Serious Mental Health Condition
No matter what happens, it’s important to remember that anyone suffering from BPD is truly suffering from a very serious mental condition that is extremely difficult for them to cope with. When someone is emotionally unstable it can become quite overwhelming and really all they want to do is to improve so that they can stop the suffering from. It’s important that you let them know that no matter what, you are on their side and you are there willing to support them and to try and help them to improve their behavior and to overcome their BPD.
Look Into Support Groups
It might be a good idea for you and your loved one to consider finding a support group that is there to help those who suffer from BPD and their relatives. Often it can help if you interact with other people who are going through some of the same things that you are experiencing. Getting involved with a group can sometimes help you to broaden your perspective on things and to see them differently.